I was bored this morning after working steadily for about…an hour. (I know. Pathetic.) I remembered that I’d fallen behind on reading Pat Rothfuss’ blog which is one of my favorite things IN THE WORLD. (He’s a fantasy author, for those of you who don’t know.)  (And honestly, why don’t you know?  He’s written one of the best fantasy novels to see the light of day in the past 20 years!  It’s called The Name of the Wind.  Go read it.)

 

So anyway, I wandered over there and started reading…and laughing…and reading…and getting excited about The Wise Man’s Fear which is FINALLY going to come out in the Spring. WOO!

 

I soon ran onto Pat’s blog entry about John Scalzi and Wil Wheaton’s crazy short story contest/anthology called “Clash of the Geeks.” If you read either author’s blog regularly, you’ll have heard of it. It’s based on this insane painting by Jeff Zugale:

 

 

 

Basically, all the writers wrote stories to explain what the hell is going on in that picture. With the crazy Wheaton clown sweater. And the unicorn pegasus kitten. And Scalzi as an orc. Two of the stories are written by amateur writers who won the contest that Scalzi and Wheaton ran just for this anthology.

 

Anyway, I’d heard of this a while back (because I too worship at the altar of Wheaton), but I didn’t realize that Pat Rothfuss had written anything for it.

 

*snorfle* Well, he did. Wow.  Did he ever.  So I finally got off my virtual butt and over to the website where I donated a wee bit to their fundraiser (Lupus foundation FTW!) and downloaded the whole freaking e-chapbook.  I’ve read the first two stories so far which happen to be  penned by Wil Wheaton and Pat Rothfuss respectively.

 

Wheaton’s short story was epic and serious (with some cleverly disguised commentary on the clown sweater):

There was a beating of wings, an angry scream, and the Wee-Tin Rider burst through the cloud, climbing upward above him. The smoke swirled in tight, spiraling eddies, and trailed behind him as he raced into the sky. He wore the traditional armor of the Wee-Tins: bright red shoulderpads, a mask of terror and horror painted across the chest. The sheer wrongness of the armor was something taught to all Scalzorc warriors, but all the lessons and tests and drawings he had seen did not prepare him for just how disgusting and horrifying it was when seen with his own eyes…yet he refused to look away.

*giggle* Love it. Pat Rothfuss also outdid himself. He explains in his blog entry that he’s learned to enjoy writing just for the fun of it and that THIS was an epic challenge. Pat says in his blog: 

The events taking place in this picture are obviously epic. My story needs to be epic. And since it can’t be epic in length, it has to be epic in form…

So that’s how I ended up writing a poetic edda. For those of you who aren’t complete geeks, an edda is an old alliterative poem. Like Beowulf. Or the old Norse legends Tolkien ripped off when he was writing the Lord of the Rings.

 

Let me just say, this poem…it is epic. It is brilliant. It has Felicia Day in it. And he actually managed to CHOKE ME UP with the last few lines. *sniffle* The dude uses words as weapons and he obviously has the power to knock me out. Sheesh.

 

In short, get your collective rears over to http://unicornpegasuskitten.com, donate a wee bit to their very good cause, and download this thing.  I’m so excited to read the rest of it!